Want to know why men cheat?

Check out this free ebook download by Gary Neuman “The Truth About Cheating” available on Oprah’s site.

Funny, he said exactly what I did - men want to be appreciated and not taken for granted.

Go figure!

Looks like there’s a baby in there! Measuring 10 weeks - so almost right on.

We go in for a “big” U/S in two weeks to do some testing because my eggs are a little past their expiration date… cross your fingers!

photo credit: Bibi

Mom, can you push me on the swing?
Sweetie, Mommy’s really tired. I think I need a nap…
Let’s stay up and watch a movie, hon.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzz…

Mr. Kitt gets the worst of it, though. We used to stay up until 1 or 2 in the morning together, no problem. Now, the kids go to bed, and I’m nodding off half an hour later. He wants to spend time with me, watch a movie, hang out and talk…

I tell him to put the movie in, I’ll give it a shot… but I’m snoozing before the opening credits end.

“Did you see that?” he exclaims.
“Shhh, I’m busy growing a fetus…”

When do I get my energy back again??

Okay, so maybe I can’t chalk it up to cravings, since pretzels and chocolate together sounds awesome to me in a non-pregnant state, but LOOK at these awesome confections from pretzables.com… OMG!!

I’m drooling!

photo credit: atomicshark

I’m hungry all the time.

I’ve always been the rather insatiable type. I like lots of everything, whether it’s sex or food. If a little is good, more is better. I’m not quite as bad as Mr. Kitt, who takes that philosophy to an extreme. So I’ve always been a little behind him in that regard, but I think because of the pregnancy, I’ve reached the point of not just matching him, but surpassing him.

It’s rather embarrassing when you can out-eat your husband! But I can’t help it, I’m ravenous. I’m doing my best to make sure I’m eating good food… I’m not chowing down on ice cream and potato chips. But it can’t possibly be normal to eat four tomatoes, two cucumbers, more than a handful of pecans, some tuna macaroni salad, plus his leftover steak and veggies from Outback… all in one sitting! I just kept going back to the refrigerator for me, watching myself and wondering what the hell was wrong with me…

Right now, the baby is the size of a grape. There’s no way he/she requires that much food. But my body seems to have different ideas. Last night it was celery and peanut butter. With raisins on top. But that didn’t quite do it, so I made myself some peanut butter toast. And had a glass of milk. And speaking of grapes, we had some of those, so I washed a bunch and brought them to bed to read my book and before I knew it… GONE!

“Honey, where are all the grapes?”

Ummm…

It feel like that moment in Jaws, when Brody finally sees the shark and says, “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

I think we’re going to need a bigger refrigerator!

It must be the pregnancy hormones. I seem to have an “on” button there’s no switch to “off” for.  Anyone else remember having this, uh… I hesitate to say problem… *ahem*… let’s say issue… during pregnancy?

You’d think I wouldn’t want to have anything to do with sex, considering the nausea… (which is pretty new for me… never had morning sickness very much with the others!) but my body seems to have other ideas.

And you’d think I’d remember this, right? But I don’t…four times before, and I don’t remember being this “ON” all the time. And wow does it seem really MUCH more “ON” this time than ever before!

Maybe it’s my “advanced maternal age” combining with my “sexual peak?” *grin*

Mr. Kitt is a very surprised, happy, and tired man, I have to say. Just this morning, for the the first time, I think, ever, he said, “Can’t we just sleep instead?”

Of course, me with the pregnancy hormones, I burst into tears and lamented: “You don’t want me anymore!”

What a bad, bad combination this is, huh?

*snerk*

photo credit: Dude Crush

She looked at me with eyes that cut
right through me and said
“You must be blind
let me tell you a little
something about yourself
You’re the hurtin’ kind”
I must admit after the pain and fight
I’ve a sneaking suspicion
that you might be right

I love you, I love you, I love you
But I Can’t Stop Hurting You

I apologize for the cheesy 80’s lyrics, but I spent a great deal of my adolescence listening to Rick Springfield, and these words always stuck with me.

I’m not good in a fight. Not because I’m not good - I’m actually much, much too good. I’m incredibly articulate and the barbs I throw out are finely sharpened and hit their target with a great deal of force. I’m the Robin Hood of barbs. Bullseye. Every damned time.

Mr. Kitt and I argued last night and this morning, and he said, “You’re really good at making people feel awful about themselves, you know that?”

Yeah, I know. Believe me, I know. At my best, I refrain - although the thought is still there. At my worst, I just don’t care anymore and let the barbs fly. Pregnancy hormones make it worse - it makes me emotionally unstable, volatile, and more inclined not to care. More than usual, that is.

Mr. Kitt and I have two very different views of the world. He believes the world is essentially a good place - and even though horrible things happen, and suffering exists, the universe is generally wonderful. Me…I’m the opposite. I have much less Pollyanna in me. I see the world as very hostile, dangerous territory. And sometimes those views clash. Go figure.

I don’t know what it is about me, how someone could actually love someone and yet hurt them that much all at once. It shouldn’t be humanly possible, we shouldn’t be made that way. There’s such a fine line, just a turn of the head, between love and hate. Two things so seemingly far apart on the spectrum aren’t really separate at all, you know.

How do you know someone’s stopped loving you - or you them? They’re not capable of hurting you anymore. Because the opposite of love isn’t hate, baby. It’s indifference.

So if I love you… sometimes, it’s true. I can’t stop hurting you. No matter how hard I try.

And the winner of Torrid Teasers #49 is:

KATIE D!

Congratulations, Katie!

And thanks, everyone who commented - you made me appreciate all of those languages much more. But then again, I’m a language whore - picture Jamie Lee Curtis in a Fish Called Wanda, and that’s pretty much me! *grin*

So picture this - there’s a group of addicts in an inpatient treatment center, sitting around in a circle while their group leader is telling them all about…

…her recent boob job.

Really. I kid you not. Can we get a little more inappropriate and unethical? Apparently, we can. Because, after the group eggs her on for a few minutes, she decides to show them what a good job her doctor did crafting her new breasts!

Can you say “fired,” boys and girls?

Yep. I thought you could.

Settling in. That’s what this week has been all about. We found a new place, with more room for the new edition to the Kitt family- our growing little kitten! I’m almost 7 weeks along and I feel huge already. Guess those stomach muscles aren’t what they used to be!

The ninth month ought to be interesting! *ahem*

I’m almost unpacked, getting rid of the boxes, and already miss my garden. We’re moving it here at the end of the month, once I’ve harvested as much as I can, but I miss walking the rows once a day, seeing all the new growth, chasing away the bugs and predators. (Although those evil bunnies have completely eaten ALL of my beet tops… and I thought bunnies liked carrots, but nooooo, those they left alone!)

At least we now have central air… ahhhhh central air! The ultimate sin! It’s supposed to be in the nineties this week, so I’m going to enjoy it until fall arrives, especially since the heat seems to make my morning sickness worse - which I’ve hardly ever had before, but apparently I’m not going to escape it this time.

And how come no one ever told me that morning sickness doesn’t just happen in the morning? If you’re going to name something, you could be a little more descriptive and a lot less deceptive, don’t you think?

Time to make some ginger tea and turn up the air conditioning!